Because celebrities are mere playthings-- toys for my amusement-- I bring you the following conversation I just had in IM. This is for your own good.
Phlegmmy: you dere?
Lil Sis: am now
Phlegmmy: can u believe that about heath ledger?
Lil Sis: no what r u talkin bout
Phlegmmy: ded. d. e. d.
Lil Sis: `how
Phlegmmy: in mary-kate's nyc apt
Lil Sis: i'd peg him for killin hisself
Phlegmmy: because that's happened in some of his films? monster's ball
Phlegmmy: died in the Patriot
Lil Sis: he seems sad and his marriage broke up and they had a baby and he just seemed sad
Phlegmmy: he seemed down-to-earth to me. Never thought that maybe he was terminally depressed
Phlegmmy: that's awful
Lil Sis: at least maybe Brit will get some peace har har
Phlegmmy: i see it now, but it just seemed to me that he was a regular person and not buying all the Hollywood B/S
Lil Sis: maybe i'm wrong
Lil Sis: those people are prolly all jacked up all the time
Phlegmmy: I'm thinking of starting a ghoul pool on my blog - running numbers on who's next. I think it'll be Amy Winehouse. Then again, she may be the Keef Richards of the lot
Lil Sis: i think it might be lin lohan when she falls all the way off the wagon
Phlegmmy: Yeah, she's totally going down the stony end.
Lil Sis: ok by me
Phlegmmy: what a terrible way to live. what a waste
Lil Sis: i just can't get the images from him and jack G throwin down outta my head
Lil Sis: the gayness, jake seems much more into it than him but that was the way it was supposed to go, pink is new blog thinks jake is really gay, but he would
Phlegmmy: oh, Jake has been rumoured to be gay fo-evah. He is the one referred to as "Toothy Tile" in the Ted Casablanca blind items dish columns
Lil Sis: did u see it
Lil Sis: brokeback
Phlegmmy: Yup, sawr it. Liked the Brokeback Bunny version better.
Phlegmmy: Oh, and about Jake and that goaty little Matthew McC and Lance Armstrong? I'm just saying there was something to that. You get ol' one-ball and Jakey-poo and a nekkid bongo-playin' Texan together and they ain't gonna be playin scrabble, is all I'm sayin'.
Lil Sis: I think they smoke alot of dope too, when we lived in austin a movie prem with matt mcc and that replusive harrelson person in it and they were really jacked up on the news and it was funnneee
Phlegmmy: Golly, ew, gross. Now I'm disgusted. Talk about O/Ds and suicides and brokeback interludes if you must, but please don't mention the name Harrelson - he sends me into paroxysms of repulsion
Lil Sis: If my husband did that I'd shoot em, and that jack nasty too
Phlegmmy: that's "Twist," ma’am.
Lil Sis: whats twist
Phlegmmy: Twist = Jack Twist - Jakey's character
Phlegmmy: I think you'd never marry someone who'd do that-- I think it took a ruggedly heterosexual man to survive you.
Lil Sis: yep, cops and Marines fo sho
Lil Sis: i like firefighters too
Lil Sis: hear they can cook
Phlegmmy: I love how open-minded you are about who's attractive. 'specially with the overlap of the subsets of Marine/Cop/Firefighter.
Phlegmmy: With a heavy emphasis on "Marine." And now you want the poor man to do your cookin’?
Lil Sis: yes
Phlegmmy: This is so going on the blog.
Lil Sis: K then I'll stop 4 i ‘barres myself further