Sunday, February 27, 2011

Sunday, Puppy Sunday: the pups of others, extreme redneck edition

Thursday night I pulled up to a convenience store in Small Town and up pulls this big swinging redneck truck. A tall rednecky guy got out and sauntered into the store. I looked over and saw a white, fuzz-ballish thing looking back at me. Is that a...? Can it be a...?

Yes, big rednecky guy had a little white dog in a pink fluffy parka with fur trim around the hoodie. I went in the store and said "your dog is adorable. What kind is it?" He shuddered like I didn't know the half of it. He said "she's a schnauzer, and she's the devil. She's plumb awful and she gets whatever she wants." I got the feeling she's not a benevolent dictator.

Yup. Looks pretty devilish.

Heh. heh.
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BGMiller said...

Oh dear God.....

Take it from a....survivor?....victim?....whatever...

If she's a schnauzer then she is evil.

I am ruled by a pair of the little Kraut fiends and know of what I speak.

No matter how sad those brown eyes can look. Or how soft and inviting that belly is for scritchins. Or how sweet that little stub of a tail is when it starts vibrating.

Inside lurks a demon so evil Beelzebub himself cross the street to avoid an incident.

Schnauzers are the twisted, black soul of a cat transplanted into the sweet and loyal vessel of a dog.

They're good for keeping the ground squirrels in check though.

I must go masters are demanding their breakfast.


Old NFO said...

Yep, friends who 'had' Schnauzers almost swore off pets for ever because of theirs... That dog WAS EVIL... period...

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Perhaps the poor dog is just confused about her role, doesn't know whether to be a tough truck-riding junk yard dog or a pink parka'd purse pooch.

Farmmom said...

No Comment! My Evil Demon Schnauser Lord won't let me.

BGMiller said...

Another poor oppressed soul beneath the iron paw!

Farmmom we should start a support group.


wolfwalker said...

Schnauzer mix, maybe, but that's not a purebred schnauzer face.

P said...

I am willing to bet a sizeable sum that HIS opinion was not respected when his SO or feminine offspring announced "we need a dog" . He had visions of a lab, maybe a German short hair or even a springer. The idea SHE would invite a fuzzy slipper with legs into the home was simply not on his radar. Men want dogs as friends and partners, women seek cutesy playthings to dress up or cuddle.

That men tolerate less than useful critters as pets shows that love does conquer all.