Thursday, June 14, 2007

A girlfriend and I were talking yesterday about camping in summertime. She said her mom and dad were hiking near a cabin they rented in Alabama somewhere, and her mom had to get off the path to make a necessary stop in the woods. She said almost immediately she could feel mosquitoes biting her hiney, (that's the word she used) but the need to pee superseded the desire not to be et by mosquitoes. The instant the coast was clear, she quickly tugged her jeans back up and hastened back to the path. That night in her cabin, she counted 26 dead mosquitoes in her underwear that were killed when she pulled up her britches. Imagine how many must have gotten away. Sheesh.

Anyway, I've bought and given away about, oh, 7 bug zappers in the past few months, and I just realized I've neglected to keep one for myself. Time to make the trek back to Elliott's Hardware for another for yours truly. Only problem is, I won't be able to use it in the pool, as they advise you not to get it wet. Shucks.

OOH - all y'all in Dallas need to check out Cafe Rembrandt in the Brewery, at the northwest corner of downtown (next door to what was the Starck club). Fantastic food and a nice atmosphere. I was tempted to go back for dinner. The owner is from Amsterdam and the menu is based on Dutch favorites, and even includes a marvelous Brussels-style mussel dish. I had iced tea (which was very good) but I'll bet they have some great beers on draft, too. Yum. Grab your bonnet and run there!


Anonymous said...

I've been running my Industrial-Size Bug Zapper contstantly in the back yard for a couple of weeks now; I don't bother unplugging it when it threatens to rain. I consider that a self-cleaning mode. Somehow or another a light colored swing cushion got blown underneath it the other day and when I retrieved it, I'd estimate there were a couple of thousand crispy skeeters dead in repose upon it, this, in a mere two days' time.

Now if I can ever get around to putting up a purple martin house, I could hit the big time.


phlegmfatale said...

Wow. All this rain = mosquito breeding grounds everywhere. Good on your bug zapper, but yeah, you need to do the purple martin thingie. Plus they are pretty. I'm partial to bat boxes, myself. said...

Now you're talking my language...local establishments with taps!

That's sexy talk to me!

Would love to try it out.

Anonymous said...

he-he-he She said "hiney".

I used to backpack in the Sierras. It was amazing the number of skeeters up there. They would swarm around your head. We carried netting to cover our heads for the times we might encounter those heavy swarms. Looked like beekeepers.

Jay Noel said...

Do bug zappers really work? Or does it simply draw the 'skeeters to your backyard.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

What a way to go - squashed by a bum!

FHB said...

Summer is not the time to be out there. Skeeters, chiggers, etc. Go over to REI and get a little bottle of Deet. It's do the job.

phlegmfatale said...

mushy - I'll go back sometime for dinner and check it out & report back.

myron - remember the Hiney winery? Wow, needing a net for your head? That's a skeeter infestation, for sure!

phoenix - they totally work, and maybe it draws them, too. In any case, I'm all for it. They remind me of Drive-in theaters, by the way.

barbara - Indeed, but some bums are more heavenly to be squashed by than others. Say, some hairy lumberjack butt or a creamy, luscious city-woman butt. No question.

fathairybastard - No kidding! At Elliott's on Maple yesterday, I saw a patch you put on a clean, hairless part of your body somewhere, and it's sposta repel skeeters. Dunno if it works, but it sounds serious.

g bro said...

"Dutch cuisine?" snrflphbbbbb! Coffee out the nose. In the Amsterdam offices, our brought-in lunch featured 3 odorless, textureless, flavorless rolls with coldcuts or cheese in them. No mayo, no mustard, no lettuce or tomato. One roll, sporting 3-4 anemic raisins did have asmear of butter in it. There was piece of fruit, maybe a carton of yogurt, and a drink that looked like a mixtue of buttermilk and yogurt. When we went to our cafeteria, most guys got similar things. Except Dennis, who put chocolate shavings and pastel colored sprinkes on brown bread. I got a plate lunch with a meat ball/roll on it. Ground beef - it cut and chewed like crumbly leather (maybe it had 0% fat in it?) For outside meals, we had Indian, Middle Eastern Chinese and Thai.

So in short, I'll not be dining at a restaurant featuring Dutch favorites.

phlegmfatale said...

g bro - Yeah, you know, I've had sandwiches like that in Belgium too - they are amazed we put all the extra crap on our sammies. I DID get one simple sammy from a street vendor in Brussels once that was amazing - it was like a pimento cheese only SO much better. Too bad your local affiliates didn't want to make a better impression on you.