Saturday, June 03, 2006

Wow. Just totally wow. The flea market at Canton Texas is astonishing. I was there 5 hours and barely scratched the surface. For $15 I got a tray of tiny bisque doll parts which I'm going to set in sterling silver and put on necklaces. FABULOUS crap all over the place. Lo and verily I did much dickering, and did my best to save the vendors the trouble of taking their wares back home.

Several vendors had my giant chickens, and at a fraction of the price of everywhere else, including that great junk store in Quanah. However, I fell in love with some other, bigger sculptural yard art which I'm probably going to get instead of a big chicken. I may go back Monday with the pickup truck and get one of the small chickens (3 feet tall, those).

I got there early enough to rent one of those motorized little old-people buggies, and it was hilarious, because I was about half the age of everyone on these scooter thingies. When I passed them, I made the "peace-out" hand signal I always see motorcyclists give to one another in passing. This upped my street-cred exponentially. The looks of bafflement they gave me were priceless. That's right: I'm bad, I'm nationwide.

Today I also invented the drive-by come-on, whizzing by and asking vendors "how much for a bit of your salad?" and "awesome dog!" and (to a vendor with a big donkey sculpture) "Nice ass!" I'm all about the love, baby.

I had a pork kebab which was wood-fire smoked right there on site, and it was the best meat-on-a-stick product I've ever had. I have wanted to say meat-on-a-stick on my blog for as long as I can remember, and now I have a reason. *Joy!*

If you're ever in Canton, you've gotta find the little Amish lady from Oklahoma - she's darling and sells wonderful breads - yay jalapeno loaf! - and she's sweet as can be. Her 22 year old son just died of cancer - sad - and such a lovely lady. Buy bread from her - it's awesome!

I met some people from Allen, Texas which is north of Dallas, and I met some folks from Tennessee who have a very spoiled dachsund and a silky terrier, and some guy from London. It was like the state fair without the fear of being mugged, raped, or having a sky ride carriage fall on you. Good times.

I picked up some green tomatoes and little sweet onions from a veggie vendor and now I'm at me mum's house and she's going to fry up the 'maters proper. I grew up on fried green tomatoes, and they are proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy, just like beer. Thank you Benjamin Franklin.

I hope all you sexy people are having such a wonderful weekend you can barely stand it.

Oh, and what was up with that wacky Blogger system yesterday? I felt like I'd lost my best friends!


Barbara Bruederlin said...

Girl, you just paint the most wonderful word pictures ever!
I see you on your little motorized old-people mover, whizzing by and grabbing meat-on-a-stick and then taking a second run at the booth to pay the dude.

Enjoy your green maters and sweets!

And I hear you about when Blogger gets all weird -it's like all of a sudden there's no love anymore!

phlegmfatale said...

barbara - awww, you just like fellow eccentrics, don't you? Well, if you're ever in Dallas, I'll take you to Canton for trade days. It's a real treat. Me whizzing around is about right - it was so hot today I probably wouldn't have stayed long if not for the ease of my old-lady mover. The green 'maters were delectable. They're all gone!
I guess it's to be expected that blogger will have an occasional blip. So long as it's only temporary!

Dick said...

I've been to Canton dozens of times and have yet to go to Trade Days.
I'm thinking I must have some sort of genetic disorder. There's no other explanation for it.

Z said...

Sounds like you've been having a good time. I have had a really good weekend. Finally, it seems that summer has come to the UK at last. It was boiling hot yesterday, and today is looking pretty good too. More sunbathing for me and Mr T and lots of running around the garden with water pistols for the kids. Yay!

Joe said...

Hey, what happened to my link? You don't love me anymore?

phlegmfatale said...

dick - you're either very smart or not at all! I will say it's the biggest gathering of white people I've ever seen, most of them over 65. It was fun and kind of quaint.

turboslut - Yeah, summer has arrived, hasn't it? Nice that you can relax with the chillins entertain themselves with water toys. I hope y'all had a blast this weekend.

phlegmfatale said...

hoosierboy - I took off your link because I thought you stopped coming here - nice to see you again. I still stop by your blog, though.

The Mistress said...

I'm a flea market floozy. Haven't been to the Canton flea but there's a fab flea in Brimfield Mass...
Here in Vancouver the fleas suck. Unless you're in the market for tube socks.

Joe said...

I visit nearly every day! Except when I am travelling.

:P fuzzbox said...

I would think that Amish Jalapeno Bread would have to be slap yo momma in the mouf good.

LJ said...

Man. I'm gonna come to Texas and just follow you around for a day and watch.
Don't be alarmed. It would be a lesson in style for me (and an opportunity to laugh myself silly) - as opposed to you growing a stalker.

phlegmfatale said...

mj - will check it out if i'm ever in mass, which I probably will be, one day. *L* I HATE when I'm at a flea market and there are lots of booths of brand-new shit - in my mind, the jumble sales are the best way to have a mini-tour of a culture. I always go there in England, and it's so much fun, and I find the best crap there.

hoosierboy - sorry hon - you are back on my blogroll - and of course, I never stopped going to yours, either. Am I forgiven?

fuzzbox - oh yeah. She said she may not be back until September - that it was too hot in summer -so if you're there in the fall, look her up. WORTH it! amazing bread!

lj - yeah, I think you'd get a laugh out of my antics. You'd probably get sick of me soon enough and be pining for home!