...it would be this guy... He's a contestant on the UK's X Factor.
...except he totally sounds like Bryan Ferry/Roxy Music.
When it comes to Velveeta Quotient, he totally pegs the cheese meter. I love the "I just hope you have enjoyed the sound of my voice" and the part when he's walking out of the room like a beauty queen pandering to the audience. I love the leopard accents on his ensemble, and I like to imagine the fabric is deerhide wot was chewed into submission by some bedraggled squaw with low self-esteem for His Royal Sauciness to wear.
I enjoyed a honeymoon of about 24 hours last week thinking this guy is sort of adorable, and then it came out in UK tabloids that he's a sex pest, pawing on female contestants and sundry production personnel.
Um, ew. Less adorable than at first glance.
Apparently there's a campaign in England for people to vote on the show for this guy out of sheer loathing for the entertainer competition and for the Simon Cowell-fueled franchise. I'm ambivalent about such things-- but then again, such spite has legs and has even put people in the White House in our own dear Nation, so, uh, que sera, sera.