Thursday, September 17, 2009

Autumn breezes in...

It has been gloriously, refreshingly cool lately. I love when the season changes. So often in Texas we barely get a blip of a winter so the cool weather this early in the year is hopefully a harbinger of, oh, I dunno, perhaps something which might be actually described as a season other than bloody hot.

Anyway, it's rather sweet that as the summer wanes we can sit back and watch bemusedly as one ACORN tumbles earthward, its rotten fruit now suddenly unsupportable when exposed to the light of day. Dance with the one wot brung ya, they say. If you carried the water for ACORN you may as well own it, because everyone knows you stink on ice anyway. The shoe fits, and all that stuff.

Remember the bailouts and how a forced "gift" to ACORN was cobbled onto the deal by the legislators who bunged up the whole housing thing in the first place? More stinks-on-ice high-jinks.

Let 'em dangle.
Bug Tussle Dry Cleaning and Chainsaw Repair:

Out here they have Real Cowboys. Apparently when they have jeans laundered at the cleaners, they like a lot of starch in. I got some new jeans last time I was in Dallas, and I finally took them to a dry cleaner in town to have the legs, uh, shortened slightly. Filling out the slip, the lady said "starch?" I said "no. In fact, don't dry clean these. Just launder them. No pressing."

Picked them up last week and wore them Wednesday. Guess what? Starch. Starch out the gills. These jeans are so starched-up that they could stand on their ownsome. Add to that the label inside is all starched, folded wonky and pokey in very irritating ways.
Long walk a few nights ago I got to meet the local shit-stirring eccentric with the inflammatory website and all. He knows where all the bodies are buried, but keeps folks guessing by couching the tidbits amongst deep, murky layers of pickled red herrings. Interesting, though.

I was told before coming here that I'd have some serious work to do if I aspired to be the town weirdo. Looks like they wuz right. Still, it's good to have goals.



Roscoe said...

Halloween is always an excellent opportunity to establish a reputation as the local weirdo.

One year's "Trailer Trash" costume consisting of a leopard print muumuu and a bad wig got me tagged as the neighborhood freak. We live in a non-touristy part of Florida; the feedback I received is that the neighbors thought I looked "too real".

Alan said...

Town Weirdo:

I have complete confidence in you Phlegmmy!

You can doooo eeeet!

Zelda said...

The ACORN doesn't fall far from the tree (i.e. the Democrats and particularly Obama).

Tass said...

I once picked up my brothers jeans from the cleaners (heavy starch is required for city-boy rednecks too). I pulled the legs open and they actually did stand up by themselves.

Vinogirl said...

Town you have the address of his inflammatory blog? I get bored sometimes :)

Off topic: these Christmas cards would suit you :)

NotClauswitz said...

Jeans and cleaners? You write so well but those words seem foreign and strange together, let alone starch. Starch is an ingredient in diets, not clothes.

Old NFO said...

Yep, welcome to West by God Texas... :-)