Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Well done, Sir Pratchett!


Discworld conjurer Terry Pratchett is honored with a knight hood. That's a very nice note on which to end the year.

h/t to DBA Dude
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

Bubble on Absolutely Fabulous



I lurves me some Jane Horrocks.
Written by phlegmfatale
2 cared enough to comment!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008



My girlfriend Kelly came over for dinner Tuesday night. I cooked a fabulous dish of chicken on mushrooms and shallots with fig sauce, which I gracefully sloshed over my right paw resulting in right smarty little burns. Ooch! Clumsy heifer, me.




But it was delish.






Kels brought a gorgeous chocolate mousse cake dessert she made-- she's a real gourmande-- and we had a generally lovely time.




The pups wouldn't leave her alone. I find they gravitate to the person they think most likely to give them scraps.
They went wanting. But Kelly was a sweetheart and threw the Cuz about a million times for Praline.
I've got a couple divine Christmas prezzies to show on the blog rilly soon. Santa's an awfully smart fellow. ;)
Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!


Glamour is a breeze.

Wit is impossible to fake.

Written by phlegmfatale
7 cared enough to comment!

Monday, December 29, 2008


Promise you won't laugh?


This is all purely hypothetical, of course.

Let's pretend a woman is 5'2" and is the super-cute sort of gal.

And let's just say one of her favorite shoemakers made a pair of shoes with robot-fabric lining the shoe and a robot on the sole. And let's just say that pair of shoes was a wee bit nutty looking with stripes on the platform heel and cherries on the front.

This really super-cute woman (the one we're all just making up in our minds) could get away with these shoes, right? I mean, like, as in going-out-in-public-with-a-straight-face getting-away-with-these-shoes, right?

But then there's the metallic basket-weave ones which also have the robot lining and sole. Hmmm...

What a dilemma. I will have--- er, that is to say, she will have to choose. *vexation*

***********
Midmorning addendum:

Okay. Cooler heads prevail. Was still a little clouded with sleep and not thinking clearly earlier. Our cute fantasy lady drives her imaginary car a lot, and I'm thinking those felt stripes would get awfully dirty on her lead-foot side. The bronze/gold, however, would surely be more dirt-resistant.

Don't worry about me yet. Well, not any more than you already do.

I mean, her-- don't worry about her, yet. ;)
Written by phlegmfatale
17 cared enough to comment!



I've been making more diminutive pieces of jewelry lately, but every so often I haul off and make a Grande Dame piece, and Sunday I did just that. Sorry I can't tell you what mine this strand of turquoise came from. This is not the finest turquoise, but I liked the rich brown matrix and the shapes of the stones. I had the raw strand of beads out on a woven African textile on a tabletop recently when a friend came over and remarked that they'd look good with irregular pearls.


Did you know that turquoise is found around copper mines because it is a hydrous phosphate of copper and aluminum? If you think of the way copper oxidizes blue-green, it makes sense. The finest turquoise to be found is often from famous copper mines such as Bisbee (southeastern Arizona), Kingman and the pure sky-blue turquoise of the Sleeping Beauty mine. Sorry- chasing a rabbit there. I love turquoise. Someday soon I'll take time to wax euhphoric about my favorite First Nations silversmith Calvin Martinez who often uses turquoise in his work. His stuff is in my opinion the very pinnacle of the craft. There I go again. *sigh*

Anyhoo, despite how the photo appears, these are not small stones and the necklace is probably at least 22" in length. I call this a Grande Dame piece because this sort of thing looks best at home on a woman who'd look apt on the prow of a ship. Fortunately, the lady who suggested the irregular pearls sports that very sort of rack, and since she's been such a gem, I made her this necklace using faceted quartz beads as spacers. I must say I think it turned out rather well, and she seems delighted with the finished product. They certainly look impressive on her.

When I've been to the range in recent weeks, I've been picking up a little brass before and after shooting my own. I'm calling that redneck yoga. Anyhoo, I collected enough that I filled a little more than half of this one gallon glass jar. See how attractively I wrapped it? This brass was a gift for Majestic Ship Lady's husband, and I think he was thrilled with his gift. Also, I didn't waste time and money on something he'd find to be useless. How clever - all I had to do was spend $$$ on my pistol club membership and there was one bit of shopping already ticked off my list. Will be doing my redneck yoga year-round now so I avoid the last minute rush.


Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Sunday, December 28, 2008
Sunday, Puppy Sunday


Let's be honest: these two have it ruff.

midday addendum- What We Have Learned Today:

Either fishnet stockings are not puppy-friendly, or puppies are not fishnet-friendly. They ruined my favorite gray fishnets. Meh.

Gonna keep the puppehs anyhoo.

Written by phlegmfatale
14 cared enough to comment!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

So, this is an absolutely true story of me, Christmas and guns from my own distant past. Forgive the repeat, to those of you who've heard this before.


We were living in a little house in northern Mississippi. Dad worked in Memphis, and Mom stayed home with me and my brother. I don't remember what I found under the tree that morning, but I was endlessly fascinated by the bb gun my big brother had gotten. As tall as me, here was an instrument of power and majesty. The bb gun had voo doo qualities. Hmmm.


It also came to pass that darling Daddy had a new wristwatch.


Dad had bad luck (wink) with wristwatches when we were kids. He'd had an Elgin he bought when he was 17, wore it all through his Army days in Panama in the early to mid 60s. When we lived in Frazier in the Memphis area and I was mebbe 1, a toddler, and bro was 2 and barely speaking in complete sentences, bro absconded to the great outdoors with Dad's Elgin and never was it seen again. Dad asked bro "do you know where my watch is?" and brother said "yes" and led Dad to the back yard where they proceeded not to find the watch nestled among myriad blades of grass. Finally, brother shrugged and said "maybe the frogs ate your watch." Some days later, it was raining, and brother looked at Dad and earnestly said "your watch is getting wet."


So, a couple years later, here we were in Mississippi. I still remember the wood floor, the hip minimalism of Mom's blonde danish-modern style furniture. The room was quiet. Too quiet. Hmm. Dad's watch, ticking. Hmm.
Recall, if you will, this was a moment in American culture rife with ads of elephants standing on watches and their Herculean crystals bearing up manfully, impervious to the crushing weight of pachydermal* tonnage. I wonder if... bb gun... Watch... Hmm...
Cocking the bb gun took all my strength, but I finally managed it. I laid the watch out flat on the clean wood floor, and carefully balanced the business end of the bb gun on the crystal. Keep in mind that the gun was as tall as me, and pulling the trigger took some effort, but boy howdy, did I hit my mark! The watch burst forth with coiled things, gears and things too fierce to mention, springing to life like a little mechanized popcorn kernel. Dad came rushing into the room and saw immediately what happened and said "Phlegm! Why did you do that?" and this is the first lie I remember telling in my life, but even then, I could think on my feet. I looked up with my big baby blues and said "I was aiming at my toe." Dad said "well, I wish you had hit your toe!" I knew he didn't mean it. Odds are, I sat on his lap and ate ice cream that night, as was our habit.
We talked about that again Friday night, both of us laughing. He said that had been dangerous to leave a cocked bb gun sitting around like that, and I told him it hadn't been cocked. I remember the exertion and how it was thus far the great feat of my young life, making that tool work, dipping my toe in the pool of the boys' club.
No chicks allowed?

Heh.
Pow! Pow!

*Is that a word- pachydermal? - I think I can say that, can't I? Hell, it's my blog, I'll make up what I want!


Written by phlegmfatale
10 cared enough to comment!

Friday, December 26, 2008

Sometimes you have a business lunch and you know that everything you say is golden, that you're hitting every line out of the park and your sparkling personality is winning friends and influencing people. You'll smile and laugh, twinkling like a leetle starrr. You'll flash your best big grin like that cheeseball guy in Die Hard. The folks around the table will smile and nod, laughing with you and not at you. Everything's coming up roses and such.
Sometimes, you've just got a big hunk of chipotle on your tooth.

Oh, rot.

Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!



The delightful Paul Whitehouse as Rowley Birkin Q.C. on The Fast Show (broadcast on HBO as Brilliant! in the USA)

Written by phlegmfatale
1 cared enough to comment!

Thursday, December 25, 2008
YULE DOO

For the Christmas tree that has everything, you now can get this lovely dog poop ornament.

5"x5" lifelike dog poo ornament with sparkle sprinkles.

So festive!

Between you and me, I think the dog that produced the prototype needs to be switched to the dry stuff.
Written by phlegmfatale
10 cared enough to comment!


Lookie here:

Funny the things you run across when you're too busy to take time to look. This is Buddha Hand fruit I saw in the produce section of Kroger at Mockingbird and Greenville on Christmas Eve. It's apparently a citrus fruit. I didn't buy it because you may note the sign in the upper right hand corner of the photo which shows this curiosity to check in at $13.99/pound. I think that was prolly about a 2 pound specimen I was holding. Interesting.

****************

Christmas Eve I took a nice bubble bath, and Praline got in the tub with me. I have created a monster. As a pup, I wanted her acclimated to the water, so I took her to the lake and she got in swimming pools and such, and she LOVES bath time. Well, last night, she graduated to sticking her whole head - eyeballs and all-- under the water and blowing bubbles. It's hilarious. And a little antithetical of what a bubble bath is meant to achieve, but, whatever...
Now Chuy can't stand it and he has to jump in, too. Next time I plan a bubble bath, I'm putting the puppy shampoo on the edge of the tub, too-- one stop shopping. Better yet, next time I plan a bubble bath, I'm shutting the bathroom door. My mom is already grossed-out that the dogs sleep with me. Hearing that they get into the bath with me will surely induce paroxysms.


***************

Anyhoo - Y'all have a lovely Christmas. :)
Written by phlegmfatale
8 cared enough to comment!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Blowfuzzy von Saucy didn't get the memo that everyone uses their real names on Facebook. I think she's smarter than the rest of us.

She ain't heavy. She's my sister.
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

but! but! but! I don't WANNA go to Mexico!


Kraftwerk is opening for Radiohead's Mexican and South American tour dates in March.


*quiver*


h/t to Bad Tempered Zombie
Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Written by phlegmfatale
1 cared enough to comment!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008
The pups always seem to know when I'm talking on the phone to Lin, and they put on a proper floorshow. They make a funny sound like a mini pair of cropdusters or something. She says they vacillate between sounding like a Tasmanian Devil (the cartoon variety) and buzzbombs. Buzzbomb is the right word.


They've figured out that momma is perhaps a smidge less observant of their antics when she's on the phone, so that's a perfect time to act up and get away with it. On the phone with Lin recently, I said "no, Chuy!" rather less emphatically than Lin seemed to think was warranted under the circumstances. She seems to think a cattle prod is in order. Says I'm puppy whipped.


Uh.

*blush*


Guilty as charged.

********************

BOOTIE CALL


My office was like a morgue Monday.


I never said so here, because I wasn't sure if I'd make it, but in September, I bought (are you sitting down?) a sensible pair of shoes and vowed to buy no other new shoes until 2009. Guess what I'll be doing on January 1?


Just kidding.

Or not.

I'm a weak woman.

I've been good. I'm going to make it.

Have bought nary so much as a flip or a flop since forever ago.


Any the who, midday Monday I dashed over to Northpark to get a sensible, necessary product from Sephora [body butter is necessary and this stuff is the only one I really, rilly like] so I parked (illegally) and ran into the mall, the closest port of entry being Barney's New York. Rather posh, that one is. Scant few racks scattered about the store hold mere uncrowded handfuls of pricey frocks. I hied me in, bent on my task and using them as a very expensive hallway to Sephora across the mall.


*record scratch*


Shoes.

Twelve o'clock. We have to look.

Can't....

walk....

on by.


OF COURSE, in that way that I have, I decided to fall in like with a pony hair pair of ridiculous shoes painted zebra stripe. Sale price? $650-ish, which was a huge savings from the original $1700.


And then I saw them from across a crowded shoe rack: Prada Cut-Out Bootie. Here they are photographed in black, but the ones which made me slobber were a burnished metallic bronze color. Be still my heart. They were $259 from the original $640. Pocket change. A mere pittance.


WHY I WANT THEM: I am, after all, still me. And just lookie here! *palpitations*


WHY I WON'T BUY THEM: First of all, the only other pair of Prada I own have 1" kitten heels, and they are fine when I put them on, but after I stand in them a while, they are one of the most uncomfortable pair of shoes I ever have owned. And that's saying something. These may be more comfortable, but I'm leery for very good reasons. Also, well, I have several other pair which look vaguely akin to this, although none are that lovely bronze color. Finally, I can think of 259 reasons why I won't be buying them. I reserve the right to dream, though...


But if there's another super-duper markdown after January 1...


down, girl!
Written by phlegmfatale
8 cared enough to comment!

Monday, December 22, 2008
modesty mode *ON*

Sis: That ensemble looks so Wiccan.
Me: Really? They dress this nicely?
Written by phlegmfatale
7 cared enough to comment!

Someone was telling me recently about "easter eggs" -- suggestive or outright lewd little nuggets embedded in the artwork of advertising. Sometimes, though, it's not what's subtle or hidden that's dazzling.

Great balls o' comfort. I swear I didn't make that up. Watch and learn.

Written by phlegmfatale
8 cared enough to comment!

Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday, Puppy Sunday







Goodbye $10 Thrift Store Pimp Chair
It's been nice...


Hmm. Normally they're so well behaved!

Now, the dumpster will be emptied tomorrow at...?
Written by phlegmfatale
12 cared enough to comment!

Class III beverage alert
Please return your trays to the upright position.



This defies description. I mean, he couldn't really have been trying to sing well, could he? I can't stop laughing. It starts off uncomfortably bad, so bad it actually made my scalp tingle with sympathetic shame. Then the wheels fall off about a minute and a half in. I laughed and laughed.
Written by phlegmfatale
20 cared enough to comment!

Saturday, December 20, 2008




In Decatur there's an old 1930s gas station and motor court which is clad in petrified wood. It was a beautiful day, and the structure was worth all the trouble it took to find.








The motor court is pretty much gutted and the rooms are teeny tiny without even space for bathrooms, if you were to restore them, but it could be grand. It's such a cute place. I love it. I could do something amazing with that place. I think an insurance company has an office in the gas station bit, and it looks like the cafe still functions. Would like to stop by sometime when they are open. Maybe I'll get around to that one of these days. :)
Have a beautiful Saturday. I intend to.
Written by phlegmfatale
11 cared enough to comment!

Friday, December 19, 2008
Once I was flying into London Gatwick around Christmas time. I'd goofed when making travel plans, bc Heathrow would have been closer to my UK destination. However, the scanners at Heathrow were going mad over Christmas pudding, and the sensors thought the dense cakes were plastique, or some such. Turned out it was faster getting in and out of Gatwick.
Speaking of Christmas pudding, here's a guy who sculpted a couple shrubs into a giant Christmas pudding. Yeah, it's silly, but it's kind of cute!
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

If you guessed I'm one to bedeck myself with ornaments, you would be correct.

Check out my snazzy new knife with the gold-plated clip. There may be a day when I dash out of my home without the requisite cornucopia of fruit on my head and crapless prosthtetic parrot on my shoulder, but I will not leave home without this knife, even if I'm in a dress and heels and it must be secreted away betwixt an obliging bit of lingerie and my heart.
Ain't it purty? I'm very proud of it. :)
Written by phlegmfatale
20 cared enough to comment!

Andy Warhol was featured in this Japanese ad twenty some years ago. I came across it whilst searching youtube for any little snippet of his Love Boat appearance. Came up empty on the Love Boat thing, but the Japanese commercial is golden.


Now we know who Stephen Hawking's computer voice was modeled on.

Surreal.
Written by phlegmfatale
2 cared enough to comment!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008
I've never lived before, until I saw this beef jerky purse.




SRSLY.
Written by phlegmfatale
13 cared enough to comment!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Monday night Hols and I went to see a Texas songwriters' showcase at House of Blues. It was so cold and nasty out, yet there was an impressive turnout in the audience for the show.

The first set included Max Stalling, Trent Willmon and Paul Overstreet. All these guys were fantastic. It was also very nice to see a live show with just acoustic guitars and no percussion or entrail-jarring bass. They played their set tag-team style, each musician taking his turn, with the others playing along on guitar occasionally. I have to say Trent Willmon is a remarkable guitarist. All were clever and entertaining. Max came by the table to hug Holly when I was away in the powder room.

The second set included Ray Wylie Hubbard, a genuine Texas character (who I first saw about 22 years ago at the Old Town Music Hall which was located at 2111 Commerce Street), Roger Creager who sang a fabulous song called "I got the guns" and Willie Braun of Reckless Kelly. It was a fabulous show.

All the singers varied between jubilant silliness and love-gone-wrong type stuff. Lots of laughs. Paul Overstreet-- who's written some huge hits-- delighted the audience with golden chestnuts from his musical canon such as "I think she only likes me for my Willie" (of course this was a reference to his Willie Nelson impersonation which was, indeed, impressive, and chock-full of manifold-entendre) and "It takes a lot of liquor to like her, but when I'm liquored up I like her just fine." Yeah, you can tell it was quality stuff, right?

Anyhoo - from the same twisted psyche that wrought those gilded nuggets sprang this lovely song, which Paul Overstreet sang at the conclusion of the first set.



It was a very nice evening. Thanks for coming with, Hols.
Written by phlegmfatale
5 cared enough to comment!

Monday, December 15, 2008
It's amazing how many news articles these days leave out pertinent information, and how many state the obvious. From an article about a reporter throwing his shoes at George W Bush:

In Iraqi culture, throwing shoes at someone is a sign of contempt. Iraqis whacked a statue of Saddam with their shoes after U.S. Marines toppled it to the ground following the 2003 invasion.


The reporter should have gone on to say in which culture(s) throwing shoes at a person was a ingratiating gesture of affection and goodwill. *much eyerolling here*
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

Saturday I went to my shooty club to put my .38 through its paces. I stopped by the office to drop something off for the president which I had borrowed earlier.

A gentleman in the office said "hello. I enjoy your blog." I didn't see that coming. I gather my blog is just an occasional read, but it was flattering to hear someone say he was a lurker but enjoyed what I wrote. I'm very complimented and humbled that folks get enjoyment my humble scribblings, truly I am.

Anyway, have decided I need to shoot my .38 a lot more. It's become the gun my aim is worst with. I'm going to work on that, though. My ego won't let me just blow it off for a different gun so I'm just going to step up the practice. The good thing is that my aim is great with the Ruger Mk ii. I hate the sights on that one, but I'm adapting to them. It's like this big evil fishook sticking out on the end just waiting to snag something. Anyway, I didn't take targets or spray paint, so I found an unmolested steel plate and then practiced shooting a magazine first at 7 o'clock and then the next magazine at 4, then 9, etc. Found I was shooting pretty good groupings after the first couple magazines.

Must shoot more. It's good clean fun, even if I do get a little dirty.
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

Sunday, December 14, 2008
So I'm in bed, Sunday morning having a lie-in, like you do.

About 7:30ish, some voice comes on a loudspeaker somewhere. Not close enough for the voice to be anything but garbled, but not loud enough to ignore, either.

Sounds like a sports announcer.
It's not 8:00 AM on a Sunday, yet.

Grrrrrr.

Great. Is there a marathon on my street? I hear crowd sounds. *much grumbling*

It carries on, the puppies settle back down and I sort of doze a bit more, all to the three step tonal range of an animated announcer. Ok. Whatever.

Then a few minutes before 8:00, I hear the voice of what is obviously a child singing our national anthem in that new, obnoxious way one hears so often. Call me curmudgeonly, but the Star Spangled Banner is something on which I'm very much a purist. I think noodlesome Whitney Houston/Celine Dion/Mariah Carey antics are simply uncalled-for when it comes to down to it. In fact, I think properly sung, it's the text and the grandiosity of its musical structure which is so deeply stirring. However good a singer may be, I think the SSB is not the moment for someone to showboat and take license with the meter of the melody, festooning its form with great syrupy swags of unwritten notes which the whole song has to stop to accommodate. You know the reason so many people add all those extra notes? It's because it's SUCH a hard song to sing with its high notes and sustained tones. Sing it as written and well and then I'll be impressed, baby, or don't sing it all.

So, as the song was ending was when the jet fighter flew over. Nice. So much for more sleep. *harumph*
Written by phlegmfatale
7 cared enough to comment!

Saturday, December 13, 2008
Lady Hosen.


We're too sexy for our torsos.

Clothing for all Weman
Jefferson Avenue, Oak Cliff
Written by phlegmfatale
7 cared enough to comment!

Friday, December 12, 2008
Aw, shucks!



Bettie Page died yesterday.
Written by phlegmfatale
16 cared enough to comment!

Wow.



Okay - this is the kind of geekery that makes me so love the internet.



Did you know that over at coolnumbers.com you can look up the serial number of a dollar bill to find its universal coolness index? Srsly.



For example, from the UCI Hall of Fame comes this gem with a whopping coolness quotient of 99.77%:




The Hall of Fame number you chose was 44444444.
Congratulations! You have found an extremely cool number! It has a
Universal Coolness Index of 99.77%

44444444 contains an 8-of-a-kind together. Only 0.000010% of 8-digit numbers have this combination.
44444444 has 1 unique digit. In 0.000010% of 8-digit numbers, there is 1 unique digits.
44444444 is a palindrome! Only 0.010% of 8-digit numbers are palindromes.
All of the digits in 44444444 are powers of 2. Only 0.070% of 8-digit numbers have this property.
All of the digits in 44444444 are even! Only 0.39% of 8-digit numbers have this property.

Labels:

Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Thursday, December 11, 2008
m r chickens.

m r not chickens

o s a r chickens: saddam wings?
o! i s a r chickens!





The dictator’s history of war crimes and genocide has been elided and somehow
translated into the Passion Barbecue Chicken Wings shop's light-hearted motto: ‘Saddam loved a challenge – and eating our spicy wings needs the same courage’


and later in the article:


Another local added: "It's a sick gimmick. But you can bet that where Saddam is now is a hell of a lot hotter than any spicy chicken.”


*hyuk!*


Actually, one thing I heard was that when Saddam was found in that hole in the ground, he'd been subsisting on fun-size candy bars. I can't quite wrap my brain around how, but that seems somehow poetic. Fun size.


Hunh.

Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Try the whine. It was a very good month.
I'll give it a 7, but I can't dance to it.

Planning my annual Christmas party for residents, recent high utilities and taxes have resulted in a drastically reduced budget for food/drinks/door prizes. This pains me. The people who have been such great and loyal tenants year 'round deserve a little token of esteem at the very least.

I called up people at several local arts, concert and sporting venues and got more than 3 dozen comped tickets for major events donated from these generous facilities. Thrilled that I'd be able to possibly have enough for everyone in attendance to win at least one pair of tickets, I crowed to the owner of the company, thinking he'd be pleased. He said "that's all very well, but please don't put your own name in the drawing."

Thank you, Captain Obvious!

Excuse me-- last I checked, I'm being compensated for my time and efforts. My concern was that the residents should feel we'd made some small effort to treat them to some enjoyable event to which they could take a pal or a significant other. Why, oh why would I want to horn in on the very gifts I sought to give them?

More disturbing, how can someone know me for this many years and be so obtuse as to think I would licentiously elbow in on goodies I actively sought for someone else? Then again, perhaps the only intention was to insult me.

Well done on that score.
Written by phlegmfatale
13 cared enough to comment!

Tuesday, December 09, 2008
SHOPPING REPORT

Several people have asked where I came up with those nutty checks by the artist Shag. Well, I got them from Message! Products, and they have a couple other featured offbeat artists, as well, but you really have to know where to look for them.




You can see Shag's style is that sort of tiki/lounge/voodoo effect.

There are also checks by an artist called Kozik. LOVE the pig with the knife. Yes, these checks can be yours!




Tell your bill payment centers what you really think of them. Dear electric company...
Written by phlegmfatale
3 cared enough to comment!

Monday, December 08, 2008
IMPORTANT QUESTION - OPINIONS NEEDED:


I'm about to send in my app for my chl. Larry Bartek told our class we all should be meticulous in the presentation of materials in the packet we must send in. He said you don't want to give the paper shuffler any reason to reject your application, because it may make the process take even longer or result in you not being granted your license altogether.


This got me to thinking.


I put my packet together this weekend and slipped the check in. Then I suddenly was given to wonder if the printed decoration on my check might result in a rejection of my application because they may conclude I'm barking mad. Think about it this way: some $5 an hour public employee paper shuffler is more than likely one of Obama's athletic supporters, and may be disinclined to look favorably upon this process from the git-go.


To wit, here is the check company's display image of my checks:



The artist is Shag and the picture is called Wives with Knives. A bunch of shriners are sitting around drinking cocktails whilst watching a too-many-armed blue hoochie mama dancer who has bombs in each hand and their wives are at the door with knives obviously upset that their men are having a good time looking at some lady with a better hairdo. One might conclude wimmins is violent, or something.

The big question: Should I go ahead and send it in as written with my check, or should I get a cashier's check just to be sure? Like I said, I don't want my arty pretensions to shoot me in the foot, here.
Written by phlegmfatale
21 cared enough to comment!



Okay, so this old graveyard in Aurora Texas supposedly holds the remains of a pilot who crashed an alien spaceship here in 1897. Yup. THis is an official state historical marker, dated 1976.

I looked around a bit, saw a lot of mid to late 19th century graves in the front section of the graveyard, but didn't notice any spaceman graves. Perhaps if you visit the place at night, one of them glows. Still, as with any place of historic significance, it's the state-generated plaque one really came to see, right? Remember the Alamo? They have a plaque. But no basement.

Whaddayaknow if YouTube doesn't have something on this place. In comments, Holly said

"Aurora, Texas" recorded by Allen Damron is a most excellent song telling the
story of the alien ship that crashed into Judge Proctor's windmill.

Couldn't find Mr. Damron's song on YouTube, but I did find this bit:

Written by phlegmfatale
9 cared enough to comment!

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Teaser:


Sunday was a glorious day. Within a 2 hour drive of Dallas, there's a rich panoply of photo subjects. Will elaborate more on tomorrow's post. (or not).


But saw this incredible rock on a building clad in petrified wood. Looks like sandstone, looks like two lovers to me. Klimt would approve.


I think they are kissing.
Written by phlegmfatale
7 cared enough to comment!




Saturday was a good day.




Chuy went for his last puppy shots. Got my oil changed. Took a guitar lesson. Bids on my ebay crap went up by $100 so that's $100 more to make up for what I spent on my geetar. Yays!
You know how you let the email pile up in your in box? Well, one of the problems of buying your camera a card with a jillion chiggerbites of memory is that stuff will stack up on you and it's a bear to sort through. Now the memory card in the camera is empty, and I've got new photos for the Diorama, which I have sorely neglected for yonks. Anyhoo, the main thing is that's thousands of photos I won't be carrying around in my camera next time. It feels lighter already!


Here's a little green bottle type wasp I snapped in October. It was brilliantly colored, but impossibly tiny. You can see it next to a Varsity disposable fountain pen nib to get an idea of the scale. Click either picture to embiggenate. Nifty stuff. (The reason I was able to photograph this little guy is I came outside and found him awash in the doggies' water bowl, so I fished him out and he hung around on this concrete wall long enough for me to run get my camera while he dried.

One of these days I'll get a better handle on the intricacies of my camera. Was going to liken my camera skill set to the Wright Brothers suddenly manning the helm of a 747, but I think to do so would be to insult Mssrs. Orville and Wilbur. Oh well, one of these days...

Today will be a gorgeous day. I hope get a picture of a Texas graveyard with an 19th century alien grave. Srsly. Pictures tomorrow. :) Watch this space.

Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Saturday, December 06, 2008






Fluevog of the day: Here's one of my oldest pair of 'Vogs still in circulation. Yes, they're gold. Yes, they're pearly. They are Michaels from John Fluevog's Angel series with the Original Angelic Sole, 100% Natural, Biodegradable, Resoleable. Resists alkali, water, acid, fatigue and Satan*. Got these shoes about 13 years ago at a shop in Austin. I have these same shoes in black/burgundy and brown/forest, but the pearly gold ones have a special place in my heart.

Step righteous over here, brothers and sisters.

OMG! Just remembered. Looking at these shoes, I was thinking I wore them to England once. I sprained my ankle in them while I was there. (*I recommend these for everything but cobblestones after too long at the pub) I was also wearing these when approached by a Cockney foot fetishist and I really can't tell that story in print because you've just got to hear the accent to really appreciate it.

No one seemed to want me to get a clear picture of these shoes, for some reason. Praline didn't want me to get a clear shot, and yes, the buttress flying through the other photo is Chu-man fu, who's going to get his 15 week shots today. What's really cool is one of the techs at my vet's office rescued a little female who was Chuy's littermate, so when I take him in, they get to romp a bit. She's a very cute girl, but, of course, I got the real gem from that litter.
Have a great Saturday!
Written by phlegmfatale
14 cared enough to comment!

Friday, December 05, 2008
In a perfect world, there would be a cigar bar in a former church called Holy Smokes.

There also would be a diner run by a couple named Sam and Ella which would specialize in undercooked pork, questionable eggs and dubious potaters.

There would be a landscaping company run by shade-tree law enforcement officers and it would be called Lawn Order.


That is all.
Written by phlegmfatale
6 cared enough to comment!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Um I'll take "Tacky Stuff" for $2000, Alex.
Went over to Oak Cliff to get some Diorama photos a few days back. Went by the Texas Theater on Jefferson Avenue. For those of you who don't know, Texas Theater was where one Lee Harvey was nabbed some 45 years ago. They've redone the sign, which is great - I think it's a lovely theater, actually.
Anyhoo, it's got landmark status, no doubt, and now some arts and theatrical events are being held there.

Anyhoo, apparently on November 22, Oliver Stone's JFK was screened there. I dunno - struck me as a little odd, as in of questionable taste.
Written by phlegmfatale
4 cared enough to comment!

Breda did a broadcast sort of meme tag, and I'll take the bait, all the while feeling guilty that I owe a response to a Brigid tag,which I rilly will get to soon!

1. Started your own blog.
2. Slept under the stars.
3. Played in a band.
4. Visited Hawaii.
5. Watched a meteor shower.
6. Given more than you can afford to charity.
7. Been to Disneyland.
8. Climbed a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis.
10. Sang a solo.
11. Bungee jumped. Never will.
12. Visited Paris. Uh, does having a layover at Orly count? If so, hated it.
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea.
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. Working on guitar, now.
15. Adopted a child. rescued one very noble and virile chiweenie
16. Had food poisoning.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty.
18. Grown your own vegetables.
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.
20. Slept on an overnight train.
21. Had a pillow fight.
22. Hitch hiked.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill.
24. Built a snow fort.
25. Held a lamb.
26. Gone skinny dipping.
27. Run a Marathon.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice.
29. Seen a total eclipse.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset.
31. Hit a home run.
32. Been on a cruise.
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. Have been to Skye, but who knows where all the others were from?
35. Seen an Amish community. I'm guessing Mennonites count
36. Taught yourself a new language. Have made a study of geek for the past 14ish years.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied. Have had a lot of money, and it doesn't satisfy in the way one expects. True satisfaction can not possibly come from something like money. It doesn't suck, but it doesn't salve the yearnings of the soul.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person.
39. Gone rock (wall) climbing.
40. Seen Michelangelo's David.
41. Sung karaoke.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt.
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.
44. Visited Africa.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight.
46. Been transported in an ambulance.
47. Had your portrait painted drawn.
8. Gone deep sea fishing.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person.
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling.
52. Kissed in the rain.
53. Played in the mud.
54. Gone to a drive-in theater.
55. Been in a movie. Was an extra once
56. Visited the Great Wall of China. (my best friend has!)
57. Started a business.
58. Taken a martial arts class.
59. Visited Russia.
60. Served at a soup kitchen.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies.
62. Gone whale watching.
63. Got flowers for no reason.
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma.
65. Gone sky diving.
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp.
67. Bounced a check.
68. Flown in a helicopter.
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.
71. Eaten Caviar.
72. Pieced a quilt.
73. Stood in Times Square.
74. Toured the Everglades.
75. Been fired from a job. Uh, several
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London.
77. Broken a bone.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle.
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person.
80. Published a book.
81. Visited the Vatican.
82. Bought a brand new car.
83. Walked in Jerusalem.
84. Had your picture in the newspaper.
85. Read the entire Bible.
86. Visited the White House.
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating.
88. Had chickenpox.
89. Saved someone’s life.
90. Sat on a jury.
91. Met someone famous.
92. Joined a book club.
93. Lost a loved one.
94. Had a baby.
95. Seen the Alamo in person.
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake.
97. Been involved in a law suit.
98. Owned a cell phone.
99. Been stung by a bee.
100. Read an entire book in one day. so long as little kid books count
Written by phlegmfatale
9 cared enough to comment!

Wednesday, December 03, 2008


Sorry for the crap lighting, but here's some more stuff. The olive pearl and crystal necklace from a few weeks ago needed earrings, I thought, so I whipped these up late Tuesday night. I had a bear of a time finding some 24 ga wire that would go through the teeniest pearl holes, but I dug and dug and finally came up with some. It was water everywhere and not a drop to drink because I had to dig through pounds of sterling and fine silver bezel and bead wire, stuff like that, just to find the regular wire.
By the way, sterling is .925 pure, whereas fine silver is .999. Fine silver is great because it never tarnishes. Sterling will tarnish because of that other .075% metal in the mix, but I think that other metal helps make it harder. I could be wrong, though. I love Karen Hill Tribe silver from the remotest areas of Thailand, because it's usually fine silver and it has a whitish, burnished sort of quality. Plus, I generally like tribal jewelry anyway because it's so interesting. Other tribal stuff I love is Nagaland, Tekke and Tuareg tribes from Asia and Africa. Grand stuff.
Yup, the photo background is a terry cloth washrag. I know: fancy.

For some time I'd been craving a strand of irregular, mismatched white pearls for myself, so I strung these up a few days ago. I wore them Monday for the first time, and they are a nice comfortable length and look dressy but not too fussy. I'm pretty pleased with the progression of my pearl knotting. I'm still working with silk, but one of these days I'll try some synthetic thread and see how it makes up. I have my particular tastes and dislikes, but I also think it's good to be a little open-minded about materials - it'd be a shame to find out many years down the road that one preferred the material they'd turned their nose up at out of some personal and irrational prejudice.
*************************
Your Freudian Slip is showing...
In a professional capacity, someone I have to deal with said something I KNEW but which he'd heretofore never admitted. At the end of our meeting, he said there was something else he'd wanted to mention to me. He sat a moment and I fiddled with some paperwork I needed to finish, and after a while I said "was there something else you needed to tell me?" and I could tell he was wracking his brain to come up with it as he distractedly said "there was something else I wanted to criticize you for." Funny thing is, I don't think he realized what he'd said.
Now, why do I want to leave Dallas? Hmm...
Written by phlegmfatale
9 cared enough to comment!

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Me too, Breda!
What are the odds that we would wear the very same polish on the same day?
Written by phlegmfatale
16 cared enough to comment!

Monday, a vendor rep on property repairing a piece of equipment came to my office to tell me the equipment still wasn't put aright.

Him: I'm going to have to have a talk with our parts supplier. He keeps giving me the wrong part.
Me: Tell him if he keeps that up I'm going to come over there and spank him.
Him, grinning: Yes, ma'am!


That's what I like to hear.

Labels:

Written by phlegmfatale
11 cared enough to comment!

Monday, December 01, 2008
Sometimes, disparate qualities converge and result in a whole greater than the sum of its parts. Culture, taste and sensibility expand and contract and we find ourselves mere leaves floating along their tempestuous currents. Then for one shining instant the most unlikely of elements collide to form a molecule of something distinctive and in its way the embodiment of that moment's perfections, flaws and incongruencies.



From one such happy accident came this gorgeous moment frozen in amber. Al Bowlly would have a rough time making it in the professional music circuit of today with its idiotically Hollywood standards. Monia Liter's brilliant technique on the old 88's might fare slightly better but only just. But they were here at the moment meant for them, and they did what they were born to do, and in so many ways, they are the very embodiment of one of the most brilliant epochs in the evolution of the music of our species.

Find your moment and be in it.
Dare to sing, even if it's not perfect, or correct or anyone else's ideal-- someone out there wants to hear you sing.


From Wikipedia:
Albert Allick 'Al' Bowlly (January 7, 1899 – April 17, 1941) was a popular British Jazz singer in the United Kingdom during the 1930s, making more than 1,000 recordings between 1927 and 1941. Bowlly was born in Mozambique to Greek and Lebanese parents who met en route to Australia and moved to South Africa. He was brought up in Johannesburg, South Africa. He was killed by the explosion of a parachute mine outside his apartment in Jermyn Street, London during the Blitz.
Written by phlegmfatale
2 cared enough to comment!


Name: Phlegmfatale
Location: Elsewhere, Texas, USA

I'm not whining;
I'm unburdening.
FATALE ABSTRACTION


Learn more here




follow phlegmfatale at http://twitter.com
September 2002

November 2002

January 2003

March 2003

June 2003

July 2003

August 2003

September 2003

October 2003

November 2003

December 2003

January 2004

February 2004

March 2004

April 2004

May 2004

June 2004

July 2004

August 2004

September 2004

October 2004

November 2004

December 2004

March 2005

April 2005

June 2005

July 2005

August 2005

September 2005

October 2005

November 2005

December 2005

January 2006

February 2006

March 2006

April 2006

May 2006

June 2006

July 2006

August 2006

September 2006

October 2006

November 2006

December 2006

January 2007

February 2007

March 2007

April 2007

May 2007

June 2007

July 2007

August 2007

September 2007

October 2007

November 2007

December 2007

January 2008

February 2008

March 2008

April 2008

May 2008

June 2008

July 2008

August 2008

September 2008

October 2008

November 2008

December 2008

January 2009

February 2009

March 2009

April 2009

May 2009

June 2009

July 2009

August 2009

September 2009

October 2009

November 2009

December 2009

January 2010

February 2010

March 2010

April 2010

May 2010

June 2010

July 2010

August 2010

September 2010

October 2010

November 2010

December 2010

January 2011

February 2011

March 2011

April 2011

May 2011

June 2011

July 2011

August 2011

September 2011

October 2011

November 2011

December 2011

January 2012

February 2012

March 2012

April 2012

May 2012

June 2012

July 2012

August 2012

September 2012

October 2012

November 2012

December 2012

January 2013

February 2013

March 2013

April 2013

May 2013

June 2013

July 2013

August 2013

September 2013

October 2013

November 2013

December 2013

January 2014

February 2014

March 2014

April 2014

Who links to me?