Tuesday, June 07, 2011

Phlegmfest June 2011: The Spankening.

Yes, you read that correctly. Himself and I hosted the gathering of The Tribe at my place last weekend, and this one was my favorite so far. There were some dear folk who would have improved the occasion but couldn't make it, but the rest of us soldiered on and did enough R&R for our number tenfold.

As happens when you get this many sexy, adorable women together, there was a fair bit of grab-butt played, mostly between said sexy, adorable women. Several of them synchronized for an attack on me while I was mid sentence, but I didn't miss a beat, finished my utterance and declared "I've been gang-spanked!"

The esteemed attendees, in no particular order, were: Ambulance Driver and Katy Beth, Sci-Fi and lovely wife; Atomic Nerds, Christina, Jennifer and Evyl Robot; Mulligan and Pa and girlfriend; JPG and Holly(birthday girl!); Matt G; NcongruNt; FarmGirl, FarmMom and FarmDad; Spear; Old NFO; Tolewyn; Chris ex Machina. If I left anyone off, please kick me and I'll correct this. I'm still wiped out and not thinking entirely clearly.

I swear I saw a tear sparkling in Ambulance Driver's eye as Katy Beth proudly showed him her first tramp stamp (which I assured her will come off with baby oil, or good, clean living). I know it was an emotional time for him.

I cooked my first brisket, and I think it turned out quite well, but next time I'll do more like 20 lbs rather than 12.5. Thanks to Old NFO for KP on the roaster, and thanks to the lovely bevy of Kitchen Bitches who left my kitchen SOOO much cleaner than it was when you all arrived. :) FarmMom made some toe-curling tater salad, and that was wonderful. The well made a fabulous drink repository with the kiddie pool liner. The Nerd Beer was fabulous. Jennifer's lumpia were delectable. Mulligan's lady's sopapilla cheesecake was decadent as was Mulligan's cheese dip. The whole weekend was chock-full of grand times, good food and great guns.

Did I mention there were guns? Evyl's holsters are marvelous, and one lovely soul bequeathed a proper pistol upon me which will be my carry gun forthwith. I'm planning Evyl to make me a shoulder holster for that one. Yee haw!

The folks who arrived early set to helping get last minute spruce-ups done. Old NFO suggested we need to have a bigger, construction-style task ready and just use the gang while they are in town. I'm thinking I could do a barn-raisin', a la Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, replete with technicolor wardrobe, yeah? I call dibs on the redheaded brute, though, ladies.

It's such a privilege to have such lovely, wonderful people as friends. Family, actually. I consider you Family, and that's the highest compliment I can pay you. From the first guests to arrive to the last ones we grudgingly bid adieu at about 1:00AM Monday, the entire weekend was grand and I can't say enough how honored I was to have you all as guests, and I hope to see you all again very soon.
Cheers, m'dears!!!


Guffaw in AZ said...

Mulligan's Lady's sopapilla cheesecake distracted my read, momentarily from
The Spankening...
But, I returned. because I a sick, sick man...
Sounds like great fun!

Old NFO said...

It was fun, and thanks for putting up with us (again)! I 'thought' you would have learned by now :-) Hey, free labor is free labor!

Christina RN LMT said...

Gang-spanking is one of my specialties! And I do believe I heard you utter a lovely squeal before you continued with your sentence. *ahem*

And I'm always honored to be a Phlegmmy Kitchen Bitch. We ought to have t-shirts made...

SCI-FI said...

I would like to enter the following corrections to the senatorial record:
1) First butt grabbed was not a female's - it was mine. Jennifer negotiated for grabbing rights and clutched forthwith.
2) I was accused of wearing a "pimp shirt" -- this is only half-true, as I was the "Kitchen Pimp," brought in to keep the Kitchen Bitches in line.
3) Brisket, peppered pickles, lobster, and real sugar Dr Pepper and Mountain Dew were culinary highlights not to be missed. Sopapilla was something I hoped no one else would eat, so that I could chow it all. OM NOM NOM.

MrsSCI-FI and I thank you and Himself kindly for the invites, the food, and the hospitality. It was one for the ages.

Stingray said...

"Pimp shirt," he says. As if that was the only bit. You were a fedora with a feather away from getting the vice squad called on us all.

Matt G said...

I was there when you got Gang Spanked, Phlegmmy, and there was a definite squeal. "Without a beat," my hairy arse. :)

Jennifer gave great spankery, I have to admit.

NotClauswitz said...

Oh geeze, that does sound fun - there's no gunblogger get-togethers around hereabouts. :-(

Anonymous said...

The word Thanks doesn't begin to express the feelings generated last week at Phlemphest. Thanks to my host and hostess both, and to the other guests-no pun intended-.I was humbled and amazed by the kindness and generosity encountered,and overwhelmed by the presence of so many I had met only through their pen. A special thank you to AD for sharing KB with us May God bless and keep you all. Dan