Wednesday, December 12, 2012
JAWS: We're gonna need a bigger bite.
 Here's the panoramic image of my bite.  You can see that it is open.  (Look, Ma: no cavities!)  Weird, huh? 
Then there's the picture of the ball/socket joint on my left side.  Pretty normal with smooth surfaces and, ya know, cartilage and stuff.

And then there's my right side where you can see the evidence of rheumatoid arthritis, bone-on-bone action and no cartilage.  Is that a CORNER on the bone? Yup.  Bone spurs in there too.  This is because of the bite that does not give good contact and the weird way I have to chew.  This is why I pretty much constantly have the sensation of a mild earache. 

The surgery will not undo the damage, but will hopefully at least stop its progression and ideally will lessen the pain. Also, it will be nice to eat stuff you have to bite off.  Things that hurt to eat: bagels, pizza, chewy bready type stuff, some meat, hard fruit and veg.  I learned early on not to take lettuce on my burgers because the unbroken piece would slide out and flop down onto my chin after I tore the bread and meat away.  This stuff is a nuisance, but you work around it and don't think of it that much.  Yeah, I've eaten pizza when that is served all these years, but it's an unpleasant association.  That said, there are some really good pizzas in the world that I'd like to enjoy, and soon I'll be able to.

Surgery is in the morning, set to start at 7:30.  Eek!

Today I'm meeting aepilot_jim and Matt G in Dallas for dim sum - one of my favorite food types that I can't get out here in Elsewhere. 

I'm nervous and anxious.  I've got a lot to do to finish packing my suitcase but I'll get it all done.  Going to load my crochet and knitting supplies in the car after this post, and my laptop.  Finish a load of laundry and I'm off. 

I'll be so sad to be away from my puppies for a couple of weeks, but this is a necessary evil, and will only be a brief while in the grand scheme of things.

Tonight I'll pre-load some posts, of favorite music and stuff.

This is the right thing to do.  I dread it, but I was thinking about Mom getting both her knees replaced last year, and my dear friend FarmMom having a knee replaced about 2 years ago-- what they did was incredibly scary and daunting, and they were very brave about it, so I can learn from them and try to be brave, too.  To top that off, I got an email from gunsmith Wally that his girlfriend Miss A had this self-same surgery 5 weeks ago!  She very generously talked to me on the phone for about an hour last week and told me what to expect, so it seems less scary. 

I was supposed to have this surgery about 7 years ago, but my then-husband was unsupportive and didn't think I needed the surgery and shouldn't have it. Then again, he thought it would be cheaper to pay for a funeral than to pay for my hospital visit for the pneumonia that almost killed me. (Final hospital bill was less than $2000 with our insurance.  This event precipitated le divorce. If that sounds like a ringing indictment, well... Nuff said.) So here I am in my much-reduced financial circumstance, scrambling a credit card to pay and this is all going to be worth it.  In contrast, when I told Himself about the problem, he immediately said "Sweetie, we've gotta get that fixed for you."  I'm so looking forward to having this over with.  And I appreciate being surrounded by loving, supportive people who care about my well-being.

I love my friends and family.  Thank you to Himself for being so sweetly supportive and for taking such good care of my sweet puppy dogs.  They will probably be out of sorts with me gone, so I know they'll be needy, but they'll be in protective and gentle hands and they love him, too. :)  Thank you to Mom and Dad.  I know it's going to be painful to see me all banged-up and swollen and stuff, but that phase will quickly pass and I feel like this is the doorway to a whole new chapter, and one that's going to be better than everything that came before.

I will likely be home from the hospital Friday or Saturday, and I've got enough yarn to stretch to the moon.  Or maybe Texarkana.  I'm going to be a crocheting fool for the next month.  I thought it might be fun to do a daily granny square and see how the pain killer is affecting my motor skills.  Maybe that will be the barometer.  I'm going to try not to get hooked on painkillers, but I won't spare the horses, either.  I'll likely be out of it for most of the next week.  So. I'll try to let you know when a post is NOT pre-loaded.  I'm hoping I bounce back quickly, but it takes as long as it takes.

Written by phlegmfatale
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Name: Phlegmfatale
Location: Elsewhere, Texas, USA

I'm not whining;
I'm unburdening.

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