Wednesday, July 09, 2008


One of my residents has the freakiest little chihuahua I've ever seen. The best I can figure, this anklebiter is (nearly) two pounds of pure evil with a bile chaser. She's white, impossbily tiny and yet she's fat. She's like a little white brick with legs at each corner. Oh, and she bit the crap out of my finger as I petted the other dog in the household a few weeks ago. LOVE. HER. She reminds me of Brain from Pinky and the Brain. I'm sure she's up to something.

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An Irish girl with two wiener dogs lived here for a while. Gorgeous thing with a twisted sense of humour, she named the first wienerdog "Uno" as it had been a gift from her first husband. The second husband gave her "Dos." She holds in reserve the threat of a "Tres" to keep hubby number dos in line. Actually, they're a great couple and will always be together, but the dog thing is priceless.

I keep dog treats in my office for the fur residents, and the wieners would make a break for my building every chance they got. LOVED the wieners, and they loved me. Uno and Dos learned the sound of my car, and would always get in a dither whenever they knew I'd arrived for the day.

I got into the bad habit of rolling down my car window when I saw them and saying "WIENER!" in my outdoor voice. They LURVED it. The terrible thing is, though, that now every time I see a wiener dog, I have the nearly irresistable urge to shout "WIENER" and sometimes the wiener dog owners don't understand. I should expect that anyone who has a wiener dog in the first place should have a better sense of humour than that, don't you?

10 comments:

Mauser*Girl said...

Speaking of Wiener dogs and humor, here's one for you: we were at the vet's the other day and there was a girl with a miniature wiener dog named Frank. I thought that was pretty funny.

Then, however, the vet tech asked her why she did not have a leash on her dog (she was holding him) and she explained that she had bought a retractable leash but that her dog was so light, it didn't actually expand, it just lifted the dog off the ground. The whole staff and waiting room about died when she demonstrated the leash.

Anonymous said...

How sweet! I love small dogs but I'm thinking this one could be to many funnies for me. I need a calm dog to help keep me calm. LOL

Bonnie said...

I have to restrain myself from screaming at squirrels. And cats. "SQUIRREL!" "KIIIITTY!"

I am four years old. Yep.

Anonymous said...

Your chihuahua story triggered a bemember. Aren't most of 'em a pain in the ass?

FatQuarterQuiltFarm said...

My college roomate and I would call each other WIENER and we lurved it too! My next herd of dogs are going to be long haired chihuahuas. We have our very own award winning long haired taco THERAPY dog at the local hospital.She came into the greenhouse( where i worked) twice this spring....she is a PEACH!
It was ALWAYS the highlight of the day when customers would bring in their ani-mules!!

phlegmfatale said...

mauser*girl - a wiener name Frank is pretty tough to beat in the cute stakes. The retractible leash thing is priceless!

lainy - I like a spazzy dog with a zest for life, but yeah, they're not calming, mostly. It's GO! GO! GO!

squeaker - I'm SO glad I'm not the only compulsively juvenile person I know - I feel comforted!

myron - Yeah, they are neurotic little dogs, and though I had a JRT, she wasn't a yapper. Yapper dogs make my foot twitch.

schnoobie - Herd of dogs- I LOVE it! Gonna get me one of those in my next house. Yays! Dogs ROCK!

Home on the Range said...

We've had a couple over the years. Claus Von Weiner and Oscar.

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That dog DOES look like The Brain!

I love weiner dogs - they have the most expressive faces, don't they?

The little boy next door comes over to our house periodically, looks through the screen door at our cat and says "Hi Puppy!"

Unknown said...

I have a wiener (dog, that is) and I think if someone drove by me and randomly yelled out "wiener," I'd probably laugh.

Old NFO said...

Wiener dogs okay, chihuahuas= rats with hair... I can't stand those little ankle biters. One of my neighbors walks hers every day and all it does is yap and try to bite. I wish I still had my 100+ lb. German Shepard, Rex would have a field day with that little sucker.