When nice things don't happen to bad people...

A true story.


Several months ago, after applying and interviewing for several positions with local public offices, an imminently qualified candidate was offered a final interview for one of two positions in the local administrative offices. She was told she was one of two candidates who would be hired, but all that remained was that she have a final interview with local Big Kahuna who would decide which applicant was assigned which position. Naturally, she was very happy to hear this news, but did keep her powder dry. Many a slip, and all that...

Well, after Big Kahuna canceled one interview and stood her up on two others (as he was the very nadir of professional irresponsibility) he at last granted her an audience and did not ask her a single question about her qualifications for the position. He at last alluded to brass tacks and said "I think there's a place for you here. If not this one, I hope you'll keep applying, because we could use you."

After the interview, the silly dreamer called the person who scheduled the appointment and said "that didn't sound like I have one of those two positions." The lady at the office said "well, BK had some applications at the last minute."

Translation: Big Kahuna had a Big Political Race coming up on March 2, and someone important probably had a niece or grandkid or his wife's cousin's stepson's girlfriend Mabel needed work, so, Our Fair Lady did not get said job. The delicious bit of this is that in order to run for this big-flipping-deal job, Big Kahuna had to step down from his other elected position.

Well, Big Kahuna had his big night on Tuesday night, and the voters of the county informed him that, well, no, actually, they don't want to take him to the Prom. However, I'm sure they feel there's a place for him there and they hope he'll keep applying, because they could use him.

I hear there's a vacant dogcatcher position.