Thursday, May 08, 2008

I went and applied to join the gun club on Wednesday night. I hope they'll let me in because I really want to play their reindeer games. The club president introduced me to a lovely gunsmith who is going to do the trigger on my .38. He said "we'll see what we can do for it" and I said "I got a bunch of mint chocolate chip ice cream in it-- that's okay, right?" and we laughed. He was charming and said he runs some of the competitive shooting matches, and would I like to compete? I said I was open-minded, but that I needed to get a lot of practice under my belt before I feel like I could do that. I told him that I'm really lazy, though, and I don't want to do any shooting where I have to run around. He laughed and said he wouldn't make me run around, just shoot accurately. Yeah, I'm going to love the gun club.

What did you say?

Oh! I'm so glad you asked! I wore my favorite black silk chiffon skirt with the wonky poky-dots. I suspect polka-dots are vastly underrepresented on gun ranges throughout the world, and I'm going to do my part to bring to the fore the prim and modest polka dot. I think I need to start a ribbon campaign or something. I also wore my black Steve Madden 4" wedge maryjanes which I found in a box I unpacked Wednesday morning. It's like Christmas, unpacking my stuff. Well, like Christmas before my axis shifted and I decided I liked shooty fun at least as much as I love shoes. That's really saying something.

19 comments:

Turk Turon said...

Poodle skirt!

I want to see a poodle skirt and saddle shoes on the firing line.

W00t!

Ann diPomazio said...

I am reminded of a scene from one of my favorite films, Don't Be a Menace... Loc Dog is asking Ashtray for a little advise...

“Quick fashion question. Should I wear this tec 9 with the high tops or should I wear this uzi with my low tops?”

A ribbon campaign indeed. Hahaha.

Anonymous said...

Pokeydots. You'll look just like June Cleaver, huh?

phlegmfatale said...

turk - yes! Pokydots AND Poodleskirts have been cheated on gunranges, Totally.

rocketgirl - Hee! Sounds a funny scene, and one I'll bet has happened in real life.

myron - Well, perhaps a slightly un-hinged, alternate-universe June Cleaver who's averse to housekeeping

HollyB said...

Unpacking IS like Christmas, isn't it?
As far as "my axis shifted" ... for you to say you like shootin' as much as you love your shoes is enough to make the Earth shift on its axis!

fuzzbert_1999@yahoo.com said...

I can't wait to see what develops on the range!

LBJ said...

At my gun club a barette in my hair to keep the hair out of my eyes is considered high fashion. They'd love you.

Carteach said...

Lol!

You know.... I think I like your sense of humor. :-)

Anonymous said...

I told you it was a good excuse to shop for shoes.....every woman needs shooty shoes!

The Atavist said...

Two of my favourite things -- guns (for everyone) and skirts (on women) -- you got a double whammy on this post.

Rabbit said...

Yay!

I think you picked a great range. I've been over there observing a couple of times. Once, one of the local PD's had their entry team playing with MP5's, which was fun. The office is kinda between it and another excellent range, but for some reason, I always gravitate to the ones closer to the house, way across town.

You do know there's an indoor range not too far from your place, right?

Regards,
Rabbit.

Anonymous said...

they are not polka dots, they are an urban flecktarn pattern----- über-tacti-cool

Dan said...

Dallas has a bunch of great shooting clubs to try out. I would give the folks at DAPS - Dallas Action Pistol Shooters a call. They shoot at 2 ranges (indoor and outdoor) so you'll get some variety in your shooting.

Plus there are other girls there that can give you good advice and let you know how cute your polka-dot skirt is.

Ask for Trixie, she'll get you going. And you'll also get to see her whip up on most of the guys there. She is really good.

Tell her you heard about the place from Dan. And let yourself have some fun!

Dan

phlegmfatale said...

hollyb - true dat.

mushy - it could get wild!

lin m - well, if I ever HAVE to shoot, that's the stuff I'll be wearing -- that or my pajamas, and I'm not coming to the range in my pajamas!

carteach - and I think you have good taste! ;)

kvegas911 - shooty shoes! The shoetist! Here's to combining two passions!

atavist - Why, thank ye, sir!

rabbit - you'll have to come shootin' with me and HOlly and JPG sometime. It was great to meet you today, and you're just as devastatingly clever in person as on the page!

anonymous - you totally rock!

phlegmfatale said...

Dan - thanks for the tip! I'll try and check them out soon.

Anonymous said...

This post is meaningless without pictures...

Anonymous said...

Let me echo Steamdragon's point - we NEED pictures.

Hmm... just think that kilts are under-represented at gun ranges here in the Northeast... and my kilt should be ready soon.

phlegmfatale said...

steamdragon - okay, one of these days...

ross - well, if I'm to do a big campaign, of COURSE there'll have to be pictures... but you'll have to wait until the big launch. Yays, kilts! Yes, more kilt action everywhere, if you please. :)

Weetabix said...

I second the request for pictures - I love mint chocolate ice cream, and I've been thinking about a .38 for some time. Is mint chocolate chip corrosive?