Friday, May 23, 2008



SCOPITONES PRESENTS:

So I found this video on YouTube, and it's such a visual feast of what was most tatty and tacky about the 1960s that it thrilled the very cockroaches of my heart. At first I thought it was a parody video by Sarah Silverman, but come to find out it was a video of a song recorded by songstress Gale Garnett in the 60s. I remember hearing her hit "We'll Sing in the Sunshine" on road trips in the 70s, but otherwise I was unfamiliar with Ms. Garnett. The colors, the wannabe Frenchy/Rococo decor and a staggering array of phallic objects render this one of the most dazzling music videos, ever, in my humble opinion. In fact, there's so much penis-like festoonery in this video that sitting here alone in the dark, I think I must have blushed three or four times.

I'm very much into lists, lately, so let's make one, shall we?

Bed with posts(4), all quite knobbly
Bedside lamps(2), also knobbish
Model 707on pedestal(1) (so modern! so new!)
Model ship(1)
Knights with lance-like pole thingies(2)

I giggle when she coyly raises her shoulder as she sings "five years ago I did London" (what does that mean, anyway?) the two knights turn with interest and check her out. I could hear their inner dialogue of Scooby-Doo-ness as they realized here was a girl whom they long had sought: a girl they couldn't introduce to mum, a girl who grabbed life by the orbs, a girl with standards--low ones.

On to the "mystical fling in Bombay" scene, she's atop a prosthetic elephant with
Trunk(1)
Tusks(2)
More knobby silhouettes in the background(more)

Hmmm. Our little walking petri dish is "known as a sport in all of the ports." Nice to be so cultured. As Christina would say, I hope she's stocked upon her penisillin!

My personal favorite scene is the one with the red devil mannequin-- what a stiff! He holds his golden trident aloft as he stands fiercely cool, his prognosticles receiving a full-steam facial from the gently bubbling cauldron strategically placed just below said wedding tackle. Hard man, indeed!

Here too we have a pair of dancing lovelies making nice to a couple of birdcages, also bedecked with knobs. This entire avenue of eroticism escapes me utterly. Really, darlings! Frolicking with a birdcage??? Have you smelled one of those things? Yeuch! Hygiene, s'il vous plait!

I'm totally digging Gale's knowing, wistful little glance back at Beelzebub as she intones "I'm sure I know the geography of hell." Mind you don't turn into a pillar of salt there, Missy!

Anyhoo, it's all rather delicious, isn't it?

Finally, we return to the point of origin, the boudoir des peepees, and a duly chastened Gale regrets the hollow sluttiness of her libertine ways, now appearing in a modest travel frock of black with sweet polka-dots at the collar and cuffs. She's learned her lesson. It's going to be okay. No more acting out and waking up nude in strange seraglios. No more ghastly falafel. No more cat-fighting with non-Engrish-speaking hatchet-faced harem-fraus over swarthy, beastly men she's not attracted to anyway, ultimately having to sneak out in the laundry bags. It's the start of a new day, a new world!

Wait, she steps outside the door and suddenly her coat is a more slatternly, wanton red. Hmmm... I'm not so sure our Gale has learned her lesson, as she has packed the equipment for play and is apparently carrying it with her in the suitcase. She sets off in the direction marked "True Love," but I've seen the Princess Bride, and I don't think she's doing it the right way. Hopefully she did some more cautionary tale videos. I'll look for them and report back here. Watch this space.

8 comments:

Christina LMT said...

*lol*

I'm honored my goofy comment made the cut, Phlegmmy!

And what's with her almost falling out of her gown at the beginning, was flashing all of us really necessary?

"True Love", huh? I hope she has a Miracle Max in her future, she's gonna need all the help she can get.

HollyB said...

That video was CUTTING EDGE at the time, Missy! And v.v. sexay! Her voice coming over the airwaves inspired many dreams, stiffened many, ahem, upper lips and loosened many ah...abductor[, or is it adductor?] muscles.[I always forget which is which]
BUT, I have the perspective of having been there then and NOW.
There are SOME benefits to aging gracefully.

phlegmfatale said...

christina - heck! I wish _I_ had thunk of it-- bloody brilliant! You know, for her ownself, I think she's really sexy and gorgeous throughout the video, actually. I think dark brunette women are just prettier, especially with dark glittery eyes like hers. Just me. I'm afraid to Google "Miracle Max," honey. But I don't know how long I can resist...

hollyb - Yeah, extra-fancy. She does have GORGEOUS voice, mostly wonderfully reminiscent of the late great Patsy, but occasionally her technique goes a little heavy and she crosses over to Shirley Bassey territory. Really, she has a stunning instrument, and as I already said, I think she's exceptionally pretty. Particularly in an age of 60s girl groups where the pop was trending to a girlish naif sound, I can imagine what a stunning contrast this womanly, elegant voice truly was. As a singer, I really can't fault her. As a woman, she's a right stunner. It's the set dressing, artistic direction and lyrics I find dazzling. I think I did call it a visual feast. I mean that as a compliment. I really do.

Christina LMT said...

You know! Miracle Max, from The Princess Bride, brings Westley back from being mostly dead because of "True Love"...or something like that. If I remember the movie correctly.

phlegmfatale said...

christina - *LOL* Okay, I SAW The Princess Bride, but it's been absolute Yonks, and the only names I remember are Buttercup, Westley and something Inigo Montoya and yoo keel my father, prepare to die.

I forgive myself for forgetting Miracle Max's name!

~Fathairybastard~ said...

Hilarious! Yea, I love the way she lunges forward and grabs the bed post, and then lightly brushes her hand over the devils junk. No wonder he has such a wide grin on his face.

Buck said...

Way-cool, Phlegmmy. I'm constantly and consistently amazed at your ability to find these gems.

And on another subject entirely: I think I need a woman in my life (and in my age cohort) who doesn't regret "the hollow sluttiness of her libertine ways" about this point in time. We could tell each other war-stories, ya know. ;-)

J.R.Shirley said...

Amazing.

In general, dark brunette women are prettier.