Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Lohan: Be'ho'ed.

A Pubic Service Announcement to La Lohan:




Can Lindsey Lohan get any more trashy?

Wait! Don't answer that. Here the out-of-work actress gets naughty for a photoshoot for Muse magazing. Please Lindsay, pretty please? Try to find a new way to bore the shit out of us?


She was so CUTE in Freaky Friday and seemed to have a modicum of talent. Now she doesn't do anything but, uh, gross people out. She said she wanted this photoshoot to be "iconic." I think to her that means as if someone will actually know who she is -- er, was-- in 30 years.


Iconoclastic? Uh, no.

Iconocrass, more like.




This reminds me of that story about the guy talking to his surgeon: "don't operate on me like I'm gonna die, doc- operate like I'm gonna live!" "Don't photograph me like I'm a has-be-- er, barely-was, photograph me like I'm actually Someone Of Interest."




And that photo of her with the cigarette balanced on her lip? I won't insult the hardworking diner waitresses of the world by saying she looks like she's gonna say "what're you having, sugar?" or "kiss my grits!" Oh no. She looks like she should be working in a diner as a short-order cook. Yeah - she's Mel all over. Except Vic Tayback was actually kind of hot and prolly had some actual skills like how to make me a scrambled-egg sandwich. Oh, and he could act.
Who wants five miles of junkie-ash flopping into their hashbrown scramble?

Not me.

h/t to that ever-clever Tolewyn

7 comments:

Jess said...

Actually, she looks like a crack whore. Skinny, skanky and shiny eyes waiting for another rock. There are thousands just like her waiting for the next source of money.

D.W. said...

That girl seriously needs help...

Thud said...

I feel ill.

DirtCrashr said...

Ick. Horrible little person with too much money.

Old NFO said...

Useless as tits on a boar...

Anonymous said...

There's a case of AIDS waitiing to happen.
Elsewhere PhD

Christina LMT said...

I'm so disappointed in her. Like you, I was impressed with her acting chops when she was younger, and she was ADORABLE. Now...*sigh* What a waste.