I went to have my teeth cleaned on Monday, which is always very nice. The exam room features a floor-to-ceiling window and looks out onto the parking area and lots of trees. In a small tree outside the window, they have hung a couple bird feeders and it's always fun to see them. When I went in, I took my camera and snapped a photo for Dallas Diorama. The doctor said I needed to put a bird in the photo as there were none when I snapped it, and I said "yes, I think I'll photoshop a bird into the image, something exotic. Perhaps a macaw." He said that actually, they'd had quite a few small parakeets and other birds that had to be pets (or escapees) come and feed there, and that once he'd seen a very large and obviously very tropical bird chowing down. I said then that decided it: I would photoshop in feral canaries. I said that the pivotal moment in western civilization would be us coming up with the feral canary concept. People will remember where they were when they first heard of feral canaries and will order the memories of their life events by feral-canary-era and pre-feral-canary-era.
See. Aren't you glad you never have to meet me in person?
Oh, I confronted someone today, and they turned out to be the wife of a sports superstar (she didn't tell me - I looked her up online afterward). I'm glad I didn't parse my harangue in the potty language I was longing to set afoot (as her lawyer budget may be slightly higher than my own), but I'm still glad I griped at her - it was the right thing to do. And there's more where that came from.