Thursday, June 12, 2008

Ugly Furniture Thursday


Isn't this the most dazzling thing you've seen in days? Er, hours? Minutes, perhaps?

It certainly is for me, and I'm in ecstasies over the thought of this sofa yachting its way down the Nile, whose exotic waters lap gently at the barge-like structure as it majestically wafts downstream through the sultry night air.

From the distant shore, twinkling party lights dance as the sound of laughter, clinking glasses and "Midnight at the Oasis" drift within earshot on fragrant winds.

Somewhere nearby, a flatulent camel turns its ponderous head--eyes half-staff--to regard the white albatross making its voyage out to sea. Its hide ripples, undulating nerves set ringing with sudden demanding sensation. Oh. Another flea.

Where are the cushions?

Is this the original upholstery?

Why oh why did someone ever kick this sofa to the curb in Oak Lawn on Wednesday?

I'm so glad they did, else I would have missed a rare treat. I had to pull over and giggle maniacally. I think I frightened the passenger, though.

12 comments:

leazwell said...

How fortunate to have followed in the wake of the tomb robbers.

lainy said...

You are so lucky. It's gorgeous! What a rare treat. Good for you :)

HollyB said...

that is D-I-V-I-N-E! If my house didn't have a SW/Mission theme, I'd give that sofa a new home and chuck my old one.
You find the neatest things.

Christina LMT said...

I WANT!

I see myself reclining on its splendor, being fed dates by an adoring (hunky) male slave, while another fans me gently with a palm frond...

As long as the fleas leave me alone.

Myron said...

How's it look in your place?

Breda said...

Oh! It is fabulous! WOW! Are you going to reupholster it? I love the shape of the arms!

Tam said...

That thing rockets past tacky and circles darn near all the way back around to cool.

Buck said...

I'm amazed and mystified at the Egyptian upholstery theme and the fact the thing still appears to be pretty white, even on its way out. I had a white sofa once. And three dogs, two of which were black. Never again.

g bro said...

I note that you did not say you took it home. ;-)
"Midnight at the Oasis"?! a. you're too young for that song. b. Nobody should ever have to hear it or think about it ever again.

DirtCrashr said...

"Oak Lawn" sounds like a cemetery, but all that thing needs is an outboard motor an' let's see how far you can git... If it's white vinyl it might float better.

Lin said...

Ditch the pillows and do a heavy reupholstering and you have a great doggie day bed there. You might consider a warning sticker on your bumper about sudden braking for these curbside wonders.

Dedicated_Dad said...

My sister (I'm so ashamed to admit) once had a neon-blue and black zebra-print "velvet" sofa. This frigging thing was so loud noone could sleep on it -- the blinding ick would come right through your eyelids.

She also had a cat, with a propensity to "spray."

I was hauling this monstrosity to the dump on the same day my wife was having a yard sale. I stopped at home on the way.

This pickem-up truck literally locked up its brakes in the road and a woman jumped out of the passenger seat. She RAN to the trailer with the sofa, LS and chair piled on it and began literally caressing it. "It's MIIIIIIINE!!" she shouted to those around.

MMMM.Kay....

She paid me $150 for the set, and was as happy as she could possibly be. She literally told her husand she wanted to ride in the back so she could sit on it. It was like she'd found the holy grail.

Yes -- more tats than teef. How'd you guess?

DD

PS: I think that sofa would be cool and comfortable with different upholstery. It's probably from "back in the day" when they knew how to build stuff that would last. My Mom has filled her house with beautiful things others considered "trash" -- she looks for the right lines then strips and re foams/upholsters them -- it's pretty amazing, really...

DD